Sunday, November 17, 2013

Making Eyes

When I was a freshman, my friends and I had a game, the "staring game". Basically whenever we were at an event in a big group of strangers (concert, football game, etc) we would try to start staring contests with random cute girls. It literally was just picking a cute girl and looking at her until she looked at you, and then NOT LOOKING AWAY. And it was great. They would always look away quickly at first, but they also would always come back for a second look. And guess what? I was there waiting for them, holding my gaze. As creepy as the game seems, it was astounding how effective it was.

I no longer play the "staring game", but I do (as everyone does) get into some staring situations. There is the whole getting caught staring at your crush and then acting like you totally were not staring at them situation:

Then there is the accidentally staring at someone and then worrying that they think you are crushing on them when you totally were not. For example, today I was in church and I accidentally made eye contact with a girl. It was even a cute girl (she has these tired eyes like she's constantly about to fall asleep and I think its hot, you know what I mean? I feel like you don't, but I thats alright). At the same time though, I have no plans to make a move on Droopy Eyes and therefore do not want her to think anything (anything at all, no thoughts, brain dead). We both quickly look away.

Now I knew from my younger years that she will look my way again. They always do, it is impossible not to check and see if someone who you think is staring at you, is still staring at you (especially when that someone has one of those faces, and I have one of those faces). So there I was, sitting there thinking to myself "Do not look at Droopy Eyes. Do not look at Droopy Eyes. She will look back at you and when she does you can not be looking at her". And I was doing so good, I really was. But in a moment of weakness I stole a quick glance at her, and at that exact second she decided to look back and we locked peepers again.

At this point I am trying so hard to not look at her that I am more or less constantly looking at her. I swear we lock eyes another 4 times before the closing prayer. It was terrible. A vicious cycle that just wouldn't stop. She probably thinks I want have droopy eyed babies with her! But I don't, and now I'm never going to talk to her again.


Elizabeth Downie said...

Ha! Totally been there. That's funny.

Anonymous said...

Have you? Really? Doubtful that you can relate to the MALE Mormon mind

Elizabeth Downie said...

Oh, I have, many times. Once you make the initial eye contact, you lose all control of telling your eyeballs what to do.